When Life is Up-Side-Down

 WHY?

When I was five, I was diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis, which is just a fancy word for a very sick colon. I lived in the hospital a lot, and was put on almost every drug imaginable. I ended up with three surgeries along with a bunch of other really scary procedures.  You can read the whole story here. Then my family was involved in a van accident in 2008 and I lost part of my hand. And in 2010, my baby brother went to heaven.

 As I got older, the one word that always stuck in my head was "why." I think most people ask this question, when they're going through something they don't understand. I still don't understand it all completely, but I do know that God has complete control over my life. I want everything that happens in my life to bring glory and honor to God. And for others to see Him in me. 

This is a little bit of what my mom wrote a few years ago, “For me, it’s important to remember that God has a level of maturity that He desires to bring all of us to in this. Trusting Him has to be more than agreeing with the nod of the head; it has to be lived out in our daily lives—in His experience—and Christ must be glorified in it all.”

God's word doesn't specifically give me an answer for "why you were in a car accident", but it does explain some of the reasons trials are put into our lives.

1 Peter 1:7, “so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.”

James 1:2, “or you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness”

1 Peter 4:11a, “…in order that in everything God may be glorified through Jesus Christ.”

Psalm 119:67, “Before I was afflicted I went astray, but now I keep your word.”

Psalm 119:71, “It is good for me that I was afflicted, that I might learn your statutes.

TRUST

I have been reading a book for my devotions and one of the chapters is on trust. The author defines trust as “firm confidence in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something; placing reliance on something else over which one has little control." One of the most familiar verses on trust, in the Bible is Proverbs 3:5-6,

“Trust in the Lord, with all your heart, and do not lean on you own understandings, in all your ways acknowledge him and he will direct your paths.”

It’s so easy to rely on my own understanding, espicially when life seem like it's up-side-down. Like doing only what I think is best or what I think is right, instead of trusting God that He is in control. Faith and trust go hand-in-hand in the Bible. Faith is taking God at his word; that what He says is true. Trust is simply faith in God. 

I don’t have to look at life through the world’s eyes, which says, “take life as it happens” or, “Oh well”, but instead as a Christian, I can put my trust in Someone who has complete control in everything going on in my life. 

When I was little, dad would stand at the bottom of the basement stairs while I would be on the third step. Dad would tell me to jump into his arms and he would catch me. I put trust in my dad when I jumped and I had faith that he would catch me because he said so. 

Isaiah 26:4, “Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord God is an everlasting rock.”

Psalm 71:5, “For you, O Lord, are my hope, my trust, O Lord, from my youth.”

PROMISES

Night time is probably the hardest time for most people. It’s when we lie awake thinking about things that happened that day, or dwelling on things that might happen in the future. 

There was one night at 2am, that I felt completely helpless, like there was no one in the whole world that could help me. I felt all alone. I had had an allergic reaction to something and it had gotten really bad. I finally just cried to God, because there was nothing else that I could do to fix the situation myself. It later reminded me that God keeps his promises and He is always there, even at 2 in the morning when I feel all by myself in the dark. 

Psalm 139:7-12 “Where shall I go from your Spirit? Or where shall I flee from your presence?  If I ascend to heaven, you are there! If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there! If I take the wings of the morning and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there your hand shall lead me, and your right hand shall hold me. If I say, “Surely the darkness shall cover me, and the light about me be night,” even the darkness is not dark to you; the night is bright as the day, for darkness is as light with you.”

ETERNITY

1 Corinthians 4:16-18 “So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.”

Mom introduced me to these verses and they have been my go-to verses for the past couple of weeks. I tend to look at all of the things in my life like, money for college, summer plans, a job, my sometimes annoying siblings, a really really bad day, finishing school on time, or constantly getting yelled at. (Ok so not constantly, but sometimes it may seem like that :P)

  I look at these as big and impossible, because in my flesh they are, but in light of eternity and all the awesome things that God has planned, they don’t even compare. It’s like drawing a long line, which is eternity and placing a dot above it, which is my life.

 It puts it in perspective….I shouldn't get mad at the bad things in my life when they don’t even matter in the end. I’m not saying my problems will magically disappear and life will be perfect, but when my heart attitude changes, and I focus on “Who” not "Why me”, I don’t have to dwell on myself, but instead on the greater picture which is Christ.

-Autumn 

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